Mean Mommy vs Stupid Driver

Dear Lady in the Red Car,

You must have seen us. Yes, my hubby was wearing neutrals, so maybe he blended in a bit, but my daughter was wearing a pink coat and I was wearing a red jacket. I did not notice you doing anything distracting like using your phone or taking a sip of coffee or smoking, or even jamming out to a tune on your radio, but then, you zipped by us so fast that I didn't get a good look. I didn't even get your license, and believe me, I looked.

You were driving  too fast on that road by the school, so maybe that is why you didn't stop to let us cross the road. You might have been going so fast that you didn't notice us until you were too close to us to slam on your brakes. So actually, you might just be a reckless driver instead of a rude b#&%@. My bad.

Really, though, next time, could you please be a bit more careful? And, maybe, drive the speed limit? After all, we are talking about school property, not the interstate. You don't even have to stop for us. There is no cross walk, so you are under no legal obligation. Hubby and I are capable of judging when it is safe to cross the road. However, my daughter is 6, and a bit impulsive. If she had darted out into the road, would you have been able to stop in time?

Let me clear something up, because your mental capacities might be a bit lacking: when I waved at you, it was not a friendly wave (at least I didn't flip you off). When I shouted "Thanks for stopping!", of course I did not mean it, because you did not actually stop. It's called sarcasm.

I realize that it is unusual to see people walking their child to school. Perhaps you were confused. But my kiddo is in kindergarten, which means that she has 12 more years to walk to school, so you need to get used to seeing us. And slow down. Because next time I might get your license number. 

My Kiddo Will NOT Be a Bone Head Driver

Sometimes people make me mad. Ideally, I have the chance to tell them what they have done and how it makes me feel. Other times, though, I am driving, and I don't have the chance. Sometimes drivers are jerks and cut me off or do something else incredibly stupid like come to a complete stop before turning into the turning lane. Sigh. Sometimes, however, drivers do something so repulsive that I have to fight the urge to follow them, wait until they get out of their car, and yell at them. Today was one of those times.

I was behind a car that was spewing trash like a tree drops leaves in a wind storm. First, something small and green popped out from the side of the car. I wasn't certain that the driver was littering, until the next thing flew out the window. Then there were a few more things that also looked like they had come from the same place.

Since I had errands to run and wasn't interested in being arrested for stalking, I opted not to follow the jerk to his destination and give him a piece of my mind. Instead, I honked my horn and shook my finger. I'm lucky he didn't show me his finger.

Would it be totally out of line for me to make a sign that says "I saw you litter, you jerk!" ?
Or I could do this: *caution, adult language http://www.mentaldischarge.com/articles/Drive-By_Road_Rage_Signs or http://www.amazon.com/Shticks-The-Original/dp/B001GRIY7M although, if I have to fiddle around deciding which one to hold up, it's not really worth it. Maybe I need to choose the issue that bothers me the most and stick to one sign.

When I'm in the car with the kiddo and another driver makes me mad, I do my best to explain to her what the problem is. If the only criticism I come up with is "that guy is a bone head", well, then maybe I need to chill out. (But really, the other guy usually is the bone head.)