Monday, February 18, 2013

Hair It Is...Again

Yesterday, an old problem reared its ugly, um, head at my house--the kiddo's hair. We were getting ready for church, which has a pretty relaxed dress code, but still...good grooming is always appreciated. I was not trying to tease or braid or (God forbid) straighten the kiddo's hair. No, I was just trying to brush it, with yet another type of brush. I wasn't even trying to completely eliminate the "bed head" look, just tone it down a bit, but even that was too much. The kiddo cried and wailed and shrieked that I was hurting her, which, yes, I admit might have happened when I accidentally brushed her arm (because she was trying to block me) or when I brushed her ear (because she turned her head).

Fresh off a night out with some friends celebrating Mama Power, I decided that I didn't need her terrible behavior. I put the brush down and finished getting myself ready. Then I left without her (she stayed home with hubby).

That sounds simple, but it took a lot of effort. When the kiddo realized that she wasn't coming with me--really, that she wasn't going to get to see her friends--she became upset and contrite, but it was too late. I held firm...and felt bad. I mean, her tears were real. But so were the tangles in her hair and her screams in my ears. The logic of Mama Power was telling me that:
  1. This was a teachable moment. The kiddo must learn to deal with her hair; she can let me brush it, or she can do it herself, or she can agree to a shorter, hopefully easier cut.
  2. If I caved, the only thing I would accomplish would be teaching her that whining and tears and insincere apologies are a good way to get what she wants.
  3. I don't need to subject myself to a temper tantrum and out of control behavior.
When I got home, I got a warm welcome from my (now) happy kiddo, plus a picture of the two of us holding hands with lots of hearts and "I love you" on it.    Mama Power!

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